Thwarting Crime the Ninja Way

Amid all the depressing stories in the paper about the war in Iraq—or conflict rather—and people being murdered in Golden Gate Park, I came across this little gem of a story about a Japanese designer who is designing clothes to help people escape street crime.

Inspired by the ancient techniques of Japan's ninjas, designer Aya Tsukioka created a skirt that unfolds into a fake vending machine that the wearer can hide inside to elude criminals.

If it were to take off, I imagine a product like this would fall victim to its own success. If everyone had one, then crooks would probably get wise and start looking for the trembling vending machine if their victim magically disappears.

However, at $800 a pop (Tsukioka hand sews and hand prints her skirts), it's unlikely that people are going to be scrambling for this unusual crime prevention tool. But cheers to quirky Japanese ingenuity, keeping criminals on their toes ninja style since the 15th century.

You can go here for more pictures (the writing is all in Japanese) of "urban camo" and a slideshow of Tsukioka's vending machine skirt in action.

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Attack of the Bridezilla

A New York City bride sued her florists because they used the wrong color of hydrangeas. Cost of the flowers: $27,435.14. Amount of requested restitution: $400,000.

Apparently getting married turns you into a money-grubbing lunatic with a very short fuse. Yes, it was your big day and, yes, you didn't get the flowers that you wanted. I can understand asking for a full refund, but suing for 15 times the amount that you paid seems more than a bit over the top. Especially when you consider that probably no one is going to remember what your flowers looked like because they were all too busy being happy for you. And this is all to say nothing of looking like a total crazy as your story gets distributed across the nation on the AP wire.

So yet another reason to add to the list of reasons why I'm reconsidering the whole dream wedding thing. Among the other nuptial related traditions I've eschewed:

• Changing my last name - I happen to like the way my name sounds. Not to mention the hegemony of supplanting part of your identity with someone else's.
• The big rock - Two words: blood diamonds.

Given that I've decided to bypass these marriage staples, it's beginning to make sense to bypass the whole carnival.

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Abandon All Hope, You Who Enter Here

As an unrepentant blasphemer, heretic, reformed and unconfirmed Catholic, unabashed enjoyer of schadenfreude, and general misanthrope, I've been asserting that I'm going straight to hell for years.

While the existence of hell—or heaven for that matter—is questionable in my own mind, I can now at least ponder my potential future eternal residence in the depths of hell thanks to the Dante's Inferno Test!

Ah, the fifth level of hell, home, sweet home! Nothing like paying for a vindictive and hateful life by spending the rest of eternity writhing furious and naked in the River Styx, tearing at my equally wrathful and gloomy neighbors, and gurgling my lamentations fruitlessly into the river's black mud. Hey, at least I don't have to wear clothes.

The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Fifth Level of Hell!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	Low
Level 2 (Lustful)	High
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	Moderate
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	Very Low
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	High
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)	Low
Level 7 (Violent)	High
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	Moderate
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)	Moderate

Take the Dante's Inferno Hell Test

Find out where you've been banished to. Maybe we can gnaw on each other some time in the Styx.

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HOLY JESUS NO DOUBT IS BACK IN THE STUDIO

Just as I stop checking the No Doubt website for signs of life from the band, they start to post new content about their return to the studio. In a moment that brought my superfan status into serious question, a colleague at the office mentioned that they were working on a new album and all I could do was look at her dumbfounded. I hadn't checked the website in months. Gwen, Tony, Tom and Adrian (with supporting musicians Gabriel and Stephen) back in the studio?! It's too good to be true!

BUT IT ISN'T!

It's true, it's true! My favorite Orange County rocker-outters are indeed back in the studio as evidenced by three, three!!!, video podcasts, posts from Adrian and Tony and photographs from the studio. The podcasts document a surprise performance with Gwen on her solo tour and the rehearsals leading up to it. The reception from the No Doubt-starved crowd was really unbelievable. In his post Adrian says, "The audience was crazy. They were louder than I can remember for a regular No Doubt Show," which suggests to me that most of the people in that crowd were probably thinking the same thing I was thinking when I saw Gwen on her tour, which is, "Hey, somewhat mediocre Gwen Stefani solo material is better than nothing. We're keeping hope alive." (Don't get me wrong, I love Gwen, I just accept her solo stuff for what it is, which is ... just not as good as No Doubt.)

But seriously, the prospect of getting to see No Doubt live in the near future is almost too much to bear. Which makes me thankful to have two live No Doubt DVDs to tide me over until that blessed day.

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Turn of the Seasons

Top 5 Recent Occurrences that Tell me Fall is Descending (in no particular order):

1. Having to start either wearing pajama pants (instead of shorts) or use my comforter again.
2. I'm having my first cup of tea at home since last spring (pomegranate! yummers!)
3. My dew covered car beeps at me angrily when I start it in the mornings to tell me it's cold.
4. Cold feet.
   
5. It's October!

Top 5 Coolest Things about Fall (From Least Cool of the Coolest to the Coolest):

1. That fresh fall morning feeling.
   
2. Cold enough to drink hot tea without breaking into a sweat.
3. Season premieres (30 Rock, Reaper, The Office, Pushing Daisies)
4. Pumpkin scones at Starbucks
   
5. Halloween!!!
   

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I was accosted last night...

Okay, perhaps not accosted so much I was engaged in friendly conversation with a stranger that verged on being accosted. Had it been any other night, had I not still been slightly buzzed and had I not been disappointed by the tedium of the All-Stars game (which I am now told, after the fact, is typical for such exhibitionist affairs), I probably would have felt quite threatened and perhaps violated.

But for once, I decided to put my fears and prejudices aside about strangers at bus stops. Plus this fellow sure knew how to lay down his game. When a conversation beings with:

1) Hello there, you are beautiful (said in not the least way creepy).
2) Why don't you have a boyfriend coming to pick you up?

You can't help but smile a little bit inward and outward and entertain the idea of conversing with a stranger at a bus stop.

And that's what happened.

Those who know me may be slightly shocked. I never talk to strangers at bus stops unless they're old women, and even then, I'm able to find suspicion in all old women. And I certainly don't talk to young rascalian looking fellows on a Tuesday night at 9:30. But I did and it wasn't awful. I asked him if he was going to the city, he told me he wasn't, but was going to Richmond to pick up his 5 year old nephew. I asked him what was on his colorful shirt, he told me it was his cousin who was killed 12 months ago and whose nephew he was headed out to pick up. He told me I was beautiful and I said thank you, then shook my hand, hugged me, kissed me on the cheek and went his merry way.

It was a rather odd turn of events, which certainly had the potential to go in the worst direction possible as my worst case scenario thinking is going on in my head. I also attribute this little experience to my complete inability to master the urban scowl with any level of competence. But nothing bad happened and a nice man told me I was beautiful. So hear hear to that.

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Where is the got damn love???

So ... I went to the release party (photos forthcoming) for the Blue Scholars' latest album, Bayani, at Easy Street Records last week. Our (our being my boyfriend, brother and myself) slightly late arrival was made up for by strategic positioning at the front of the line for post-performance signing. A line, I might add, that was disappointingly short given all of the people who walked out of Easy Street after the the Scholars gave them mad love for a good hour.

Where is the love, people?! These two talented musicians just rocked your socks off and the only thing you can do is walk out without even copping the album?! That is NOT how we roll in Seattle. They give you love, you give them love back. $10 is a small price to pay to support independent record labels, starving artists, Seattle hip-hop, hip-hop in general, etc. Plus you got a poster and a sticker to go with it!!!! To say nothing of getting a chance to meet Geologic and Sabzi.

You fucking people.

The only thing sadder than droves of people leaving was fellow MassLine artist Gabriel Teodros, who guested on the Scholars' set, slangin' his shit outside the store looking like a sad little huckster in his over sized "The Northwest" sweatshirt. Of course, he was getting no love either. If I hadn't picked up his album at the MassLine show in San Francisco, I would have happily grabbed one then.

On a happier note, Bayani is great overall, well worth $10 and rewarding upon subsequent listenings. The production is tight and Geologic's rhymes are as sharp as ever. "50 Thousand Deep" is definitely my favorite track on the album and I was glad that they played a snippet of it at the release performance (they advised that patrons purchase the album to hear the rest of the song).

Look out for them to hit the road again. The Scholars and the rest of the MassLine crew put on a fantastic live show. I actually remember hating the Scholars' first album because I listened to it after seeing them for the first time live at Sasquatch. The recordings just don't do the songs justice and Geologic's onstage ferocity seems to get lost in the soundboard and mixers, but nevertheless, their recorded material is still well worth having. Check out their crazy ridiculous remix of "Inkwell" using the instrumental for Modest Mouse's "Float On." Oh and show them some love by copping the album, alright?

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An Eye for an Eye

During one of my infrequent perusals of the news, I stumbled across this article about the apparent deterrent effect of capital punishment.

The research seems to be indicating that executions do in fact have a tangible effect on deterring people from killing each other. However, the depth that this article goes into the studies themselves is pretty minimal, so I'm not about to use it to weigh a debate that I haven't quite sorted out in my own mind. At the very least, the research seems to operate on a "rational actor" type of analysis in which people will act well ... rationally. Anyone with half a brain knows that people are hardly rational and killing someone (and not killing someone) are often not rational at all. Obviously, no one would commit murder if they thought they were going to get caught.

Regardless, I would venture that it's highly unlikely that hastening and increasing executions is going to to put an end to homicides and violent crimes. I learned from my Sociology 5 methods course about a thing called a spurious relationship. Not to overstate the obvious, but it seems that there may be myriad other factors that could contribute to fluctuations in homicide rates. An interesting theory in Steven Levitt's "Freakonomics"—a great book that I highly recommend, especially if you are of the Malcolm Gladwell "Blink" and "Tipping Point" persuasion (even though the frequency with which they give each other kudos comes off as a little incestuous)—is that crime rates declined dramatically in the 'mid to late '80s and early '90s because of Roe v. Wade, which allowed women who inhabit a particular position in social space in which any children born to them have a higher likelihood of becoming criminal offenders to have abortions, thus decreasing the crime rate by decreasing the number of potential criminals. An interesting theory, one that I'm not entirely sure I buy. But I suppose my point in bringing it up is that it can't be as simple as more executions mean less murders. Nothing in life is ever that simple.

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Return of the MOJO?

I generally try to avoid speaking too soon on things, but it looks as though the M's may have found their long lost MOJO with a triumphant sweep of the Padres. Woooo, Go M's! (On a side note, I texted my former roommate, who is a Padres fan, when the M's came from behind to take the second game in the series. She texted me back the following day after the sweep with, "I was at the game. I trust you had some smart ass remark lol." I couldn't help but read into some underlying hostility which she attempted to diffuse with a forced "lol." Hey. It's not my fault the M's won.)

I'm not going to attempt to make any kind of sports commentary because I don't know shit about baseball. I just know that I love watching it and that I love the Mariners. I also know that if we don't have a good season, then we might lose Ichiro to—I hate to even say it—the Padres **gasp**. Okay that is a worst case scenario, but Ichiro's a free agent after this season so we damn well better do something to keep him around. Like keep winning.

I've proclaimed on more than on occasion that if it Ichiro goes to the Padres after this season, I will actually stop watching baseball. Not that that's any real threat, but you know, it's really the only thing I could do in protest. But I guess now that I think about it, it'd probably more of a punishment for me. REGARDLESS, I think it would just be too heartbreaking to see Ichiro in anything other than the very handsome Mariner's uniforms, and it would kill me to see him play for the Pads. So I'm keeping my fingers crossed and my rally cap on (okay I don't have a rally cap, but I trust you can appreciate the sentiment).

In other baseball-related news. Sean and I bought tickets for the first game in the series against the Red Sox ... and they're getting sent to his billing address in Montana. Let's hope USPS and one of the SigEp's comes through and gets us our tickets, because I'll be damned if I go back to California without getting to see an M's game.

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Shit's Fucked Up

Wanna know how I know shit's fucked up? Because I went to a memorial service for my brother's good friend who died when he was struck by a hit-and-run driver. If you think that's tragic, the details—which I won't go into—are much more tragic. A young life full of potential lost. I'll leave it at that.

Another reason that I know shit's fucked up was because the pastor who presided over this memorial service felt it was appropriate to use this opportunity to remind us of how Jesus died for our sins. Great is this family's loss, but their pain and suffering pales in comparison to God's, who gave up his only son for the sake of a bunch of heathen humans who are really all sinners at heart. Just remember that no matter how much you're suffering, Jesus suffered more (and of course by virtue of the Holy Trinity, God and the holy spirit as well, or some shit like that).

My aim is not to be sacrilegious—okay as a reformed Catholic, maybe a little bit. My point is that this young man's death is not about Jesus, God, the resurrection or any other bit of religious myth. His death is about losing a person beloved by many and about both sharing in that loss and celebrating in his short, but well-lived life. We gathered there to mourn and remember him, not to be lectured about our supposed debt to Jesus.

Needless to say, this experience didn't do much to renew my long-gone faith in organized religion, especially given that it arrived on the heels of an interesting (though somewhat inflammatory) documentary on the epidemic of child molestation among Catholic priests.

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Oh the Depravity ... the Depravity!!!

Everyone who is sick of Paris Hilton's jail debacle masquerading as "news," say aye.

Aye.

The relentless coverage of Hilton's movements in and out of jail by even generally respectable news sources as BBC and NPR is either a testatment to the ills of our country's news media or the sheer stupidity of the American public. Or perhaps its an indication of both. I certainly wouldn't rule that out—a self-reinforcing cycle that makes everyone poorer.

My consumption of the day's news, which included coverage of GW's meeting with Pope Benedict after the G8 Conference, was rudely interrupted by more video footage of Paris being stuffed into a police car. To add insult to injury, CNN called in an "expert" to analyze why young girls look up to Paris Hilton (do young girls really look up to a woman so ridiculed by every realm of mass media?) and what harm her misbehavior might have on their young psyches.

Are you fucking kidding me?

If Paris Hilton is your young daughter's role model, then you are a really, really shitty parent and probably have no one to blame but yourself.

So after a good 15 minutes of pondering Paris Hilton's influence over young minds—seriously I wouldn't be surprised if there are news reports on Hilton's (or other celebrity's for celebrity sake) affect on the American economy or national security—the news returned to ... well ... news.

So here are some of the actual news stories you may have missed while watching Hilton sob on her way back to the clinker:

Bush Meets Pope Benedict XVI For the First Time

Bomber Kills at least 12 Iraqi Soldiers

Shuttle Atlantis Appears to have Flawless Liftoff

NASA Leader Regrets Global Warming Comments

TB Patient Says Officials Are Trying to Blame Him to Cover Mistakes

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scott stapp isn't dead?

I discovered this unpublished entry on by dashboard today. I'm a little sad I never posted it, so I'm posting it now:

unfortunately, no. and even worse, it looks like he's churned out a solo album. oh the horror....the horror. as if it wasn't bad enough that creed ever existed in the first place, now one of the worst frontmen in the history of worst frontmen has his own cd??? it's almost as bad as hilary duff having her own greatest hits album (yeah i think i almost died of disgust when i got wind of that one). sure, i guiltily enjoyed a creed song every once in a while on the radio. but i knew damn well that it was crap. that's the point of pop music, catering to the majority's shitty taste in music. it's perfectly acceptable to enjoy pop, i've been known to rock out to the occasional kelly clarkson song. but just because it's catchy doesn't mean it's not crap.

so much of today's music is deplorable. which is why i've stopped listening to commerical radio altogether. i couldn't handle losing braincells from the sheer stupidity of it all. i can only imagine when popular music was equated with the beatles, marvin gaye, roy orbison, all the oldies but goodies. that shit rocked and still rocks the pants off of the countless mindless crooners that fill the airwaves with infinite permutations of formulaic hit songs.

but back to scott stapp. thanks to my aversion for commercial radio, i won't ever be hearing mr. stapp's undoubtedly pathetic excuse for music. but that doesn't stop me from feeling sad and disappointed that millions of people will and probably enjoy it. ~shrug~ to each their own, i guess.

I also wanted to note that my cellphone came with a Scott Stapp song on it, and I promptly deleted it without hesitation. Way to suck T-Mobile.

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It's Officially Summer

Okay. I guess not officially for the rest of the world, but definitely for me. I had my last final today. It went alright, we'll see when I get my grades back. But not only is it now summer, but I now get to do all the things that I've been thinking about doing instead of studying.

So I thought I'd start with a brief update. I've been told to update this one since my enviroblog apparently isn't all that interesting (you know who you are). I guess wanting to save the planet for the hypothetical children that I never plan on having isn't that interesting to most people (I would lament right now about the lack of concern about the environment in general, but I guess I'll spare that harangue for a different blog.

Anyway, so. First things first. I'm gearing up to move next Friday! This has been quite a long and arduous ordeal—alright, maybe not long considering my parents will have gone through 2 escrows in less than 2 months, bur arduous definitely. I'd go into the whole story, but frankly I'm a little sick of the story and would rather just talk about how excited I am about moving out on my own. I would talk about the condo in detail if I weren't afraid of stalkers (not that anyone reads this anyway, but I'd rather not take the chance). Suffice it to say that my new place is incredibly awesome, I'm stoked out of my mind and I plan on having lots of parties—parties of all kinds: dinner parties, sushi parties, zombie movie parties, cranium parties, wine tasting parties, etc. So it's probably a good thing that my new Real Simple came in the mail today with this headline: "Entertaining made easy: 46 recipes and decorating ideas." Perfecto!

The parentals and brother will be coming down on Thursday to help me move out on Saturday, which is quite exciting. I've seen more of my family than usual, which always has its stresses, but overall, I've come to appreciate my family more now that I don't have to be with them everyday. But until they get here, I plan on doing all sorts of fun stuff that I haven't gotten a chance to do.

And once I get over the move, my boyfriend will (hopefully) be flying down for a few weeks and we'll be returning to Washington for a few weeks. Then I'm back down here for summer school starting in July.

I have a feeling it's gonna be a good summer (with lots of time for blogging).

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Updates Forthcoming

Spring break will commence in a few days, upon which I (theoretically) will have time and (theoretically) will being posting things.

Cheerio until then.

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I've Got an Itch

I've been itchin' to blog lately and figured I'd resurrect my blog from it's shallow grave ... for the second time. I guess Facebook wasn't enough to satisfy my procrastination needs any longer.

So, here I am again. Third time's a charm, right? Maybe I'll actually figure this whole blogging thing out this time around.

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A tip for all you ignorant people...yeah that means you, so you might want to listen up.

I've been interning in Washington, DC for a good 9 weeks now, and one of the (many) things that I can't stand about the city is the all too apparent dearth of Filipinos and Asians in general. What this equates to is far too much quasi-fetishizing from complete strangers. I once had a bouncer - a complete stranger - tell me he had a things for Asians and look at me practically licking his lips. Needless to say, I've never experienced this kind of blatant orientalism on the West coast, which makes me feel privileged to go to a school where race happens to be hyper-polarized. It used to bother me that race is so prominent at Berkeley, until I came here and realized what a blessing it is.

Here's an example of what I'm talking about: I can't even get my daily dose of caffeine without being accosted about my nationality. A random man today in Bagels and Baguettes, where I get the usual (regular mocha frappacccino, no whip) every week day before work, felt compelled to ask me a question: "Where are you from."

Oh the well-meaning, curiousity-laden "Where are you from." Clearly, he isn't asking me where I'm actually from - it's rare that someone asking that question the way this man asked me (which is often how it's asked for the most part) is interested in my address. Oh no, no no. What this man, and countless people before him, wants to know is what my ethncity I am. But apparently because I am not white, that must mean I must be from somewhere else, not here. That is the implication. If I were to answer this man's question literally, I would have said, "Well sir, I'm from Washington State, approximately 20 minutes north of the fair city of Seattle." But then we would have had to go through the "Oh, no no, that's not what I mean. Where are you FROM."

I really don't mind fielding inquiries about my nationality. I'm proud to be filipino and to tell people that I am. But - and here's the tip for all of you people in DC who have never seen an Asian person before - if you want to know what I am, then ask THAT. "What are you?" "Why, I'm filipino! How refreshing for someone to say what they mean.!" Or even "What ethnicity are you." It's okay to ask, just don't show how sheltered you are when you ask.

Plus, asking is much better than guessing. Much better.

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shampoo conspiracy

I have a theory about shampoo and conditioner.

Have you ever noticed that when you use separate shampoo and conditioner, one always tends to run out before the other no matter how hard you try to use the same quantities of each. So you run out of conditioner but you still have shampoo left, so you buy a new bottle of conditioner. A few weeks later, your shampoo runs out, but you still have conditioner. So then you buy a new bottle of shampoo and the whole process repeats itself in perpetuity.

As I was perusing the aisles of the Rexall Drugstore on Telegraph for another bottle of Aussie Conditioner, I began to wonder....is it possible that the manufactors might put less conditioner or shampoo into the bottles so that you'll be forced into the aforementioned cycle? Once you have to buy a new bottle of conditioner with half of bottle of shampoo left, you're pretty much locked into the brand. You don't really want to mix shampoos and conditioners because I think that's bad, or maybe that's just what they want you to think so that you don't go around buying a bottle of Herbal Esssences conditioner to go with your Aussie Shampoo.

I vowed I would do an experiment and see if the quantities of shampoo and conditioner were the same, but I don't really have too many qualms with being locked into the Aussie hair product cycle. It smells pretty good and my hair looks about the same as it does with other shampoos. So I guess that means all this theorizing has been for naught.

Just know that I'm on to you Aussie. Your devious, underhanded, upside-down ways are no secret to me. I know what's up.

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STOP ADVERTISING IN MY BLOG

Don't waste your time trying to advertise in my blog, because I am just going to delete all the stupid comments you make pretending that you've read my blog but are really all about getting people to come to your lame phone sex blog.

DO SOMETHING BETTER WITH YOUR LIFE AND LEAVE ME ALONE.

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top five favorite albums

in no particular order

1. no doubt - tragic kingdom
2. wyclef jean - the carnival
3. death cab for cutie - transatlancism
4. kenna - new sacred cow
5. jeff buckley - grace

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the best feeling in the world

do you want to know what the best feeling in the world is??

it's when you're eating a bag of something really good that you're enjoying and you think you've finished the entire bag and then you look in one more time to make sure it's empty, and there's one more delicious morsel hidden the corner.

yeah....that's what it's aaaaaaallllll about.

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